(Warning: This review contains no spoilers whatsoever, unless you command great deductive prowess and/or are magnetized!)

The Movie: Be Kind Rewind.

Starring: Mos Def, Jack Black, Melonie Diaz, and Danny Glover.

Plot: Jerry (Jack Black) erases all the VHS tapes in Mr. Fletcher’s (Danny Glover) video rental store, while he’s away. Mike (Mos Def), who is left in charge of the video store, decides to remake the movies with the help of Jerry and Alma (Melonie Diaz).

Rating: In a scale of 1 out of infinite apples to oranges, the film gets a googolplex.

What Does This Mean: It means go see the movie; you may or may not regret it.

Ich habe keine geld: What?! Hans Grüber never said that! (Though he might’ve before visiting LA.)

Tickets Aren’t Cheap: Yes, very true. Perhaps I should talk more about what will be…

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